Light Bulbs

bulbHow many…

How many independent fundamentalists does it take to change a light bulb?

Only one, because more might result in too much cooperation.

How many Charismatics does it take to change a light bulb?

Only one, because their hands are in the air anyway.

How many Anglicans does it take to change a light bulb?

One to change the bulb and ninety-nine to say how much they liked the old one.

How many Uniting Church clergy does it take to change a light bulb?

We choose not to make a statement for or against the need for light bulbs.  If, however, you have found that light bulbs work for you, feel free to compose a poem or modern dance about your experience and present it next month at our annual light bulb service where we will explore various light bulb traditions including incandescent, fluorescent, energy-saving and tinted, all of which are equally valid paths to luminescence.

How many liberal theologians does it take to change a light bulb?

At least ten. They need to debate whether the light bulb exists. Even if they can agree that it does, they still might not change it to keep from alienating those who might use different forms of light.

How many Amish does it take to change a light bulb?

What’s a light bulb?

How many Catholics does it take to change a light bulb?

None. They use candles.

How many Baptists does it take to change a light bulb?

Change?!!

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