A guy walks along the beach and finds a lamp buried in the sand. He picks it up and shines it and is staggered to see a genie appear and offer him his heart’s desire. “Just one wish”, he says, “Because I’m only an apprentice genie, but you can have anything you want.”
The guys thinks for a moment and says that because he does a lot of interstate travel, he would appreciate a bridge to Tasmania so he can save on airfares and take his car with him. The genie apologises profusely and says that, even though he offered anything, Tasmania is a long way and the bridge would take a little too much effort. The guy is told he’ll need to come up with something else.
He thinks again and says, “I’ve been having a little trouble in the romance stakes. Every time I blow a relationship I get the idea that it is because I’ve said or done something stupid. I’d really like you to give me the power to understand women.”
The genie looks at him blankly and replies, “So how many lanes did you want on that bridge?”